Sunday, May 13, 2012

Orgasm denial

So let's talk about orgasm denial for a moment. What? Yeah, orgasm denial I said. It may sound weird to you, but it's a huge turn on, yet many people haven't even heard of it, or don't seem to understand what turns people on about it.  So this blogpost will be dedicated to understanding and explaining orgasm, how it works, and even some tips and tricks for beginners to try it out for yourself.
Now, the reason I'm writing this blog is for two reasons. I got a few people who tweeted me that didn't understand what it turned me on about it. And secondly, because I get to compare it with one of my most favorite movies of all time. So here goes.

What is orgasm denial? Well, orgasm denial is basically a part of the BDSM culture, although many other people do it as well, sometimes even without knowing what it's called. It's basically a form of pleasure delay. And as you might've thought, the more you delay the pleasure, the more eager you get to have that pleasure. And that's exactly what orgasm denial is about.
But not cumming isn't very much of a turn on, if you're not being stimulated. For some it is, but for most it isn't. So an important part of orgasm denial, is making sure that the person you do it to, or with, or to yourself if you don't have a partner for it, is all about stimulation, but stopping before the orgasm comes. This may sound weird to some of you out there, but if you stop masturbating, for instance, just before you cum, and cool off for a moment, and then start again to make yourself finally cum, your orgasm feels much more gratifying and stronger then it would before. Now the idea obviously is, the longer and more often you delay it, the more powerful your orgasm becomes. Up to the moment where some people even pass out during their orgasm, or have an orgasm so heavy, they almost get inhuman strenghts, and are able to bend or move things, which previously would not have been possible, due to the powerful feeling of the final release.

Now oppose to what some of you might think, orgasm denial is mostly about mental control. Sure enough, the orgasm denial and teasing that happens is physical, but it really is more about the mental aspect of it. Let me try and explain it to you this way.
In the movie Inception, there's a scene about the origins of an original idea, and about why inception wouldn't be possible. The scene mentions a common fenomenon, which goes like this: If you're told not to think about a pink elephant. What do you think about? Exactly! A pink elephant!
And the exact same thing happens with orgasm denial, which makes it more of a mental challenge or control. When you're in orgasm denial for a longer period (let's just say 24 hours), changes are, that the you will be very horny after a couple of teases. So, now you're thinking, okay, let's just not think about my orgasm or being horny. Guess what you'll be thinking about all the time? Exactly, your orgasm and how horny you are, which only makes you feel even hornier. And then, at the end of that day, even though you wheren't teased the rest of that day after the first couple of times, you're horny as hell, which makes you want it even more, and makes your orgasm even more powerful.
In BDSM, orgasm denial gets used by dominant people to control their subs or slaves, to control their actions, their orgasms, but also as a mind game. Because they will be thinking all day about their denial, they'll also be thinking about the one who gave them that task, their dominant partner, and in that way, the dominant person is even in their minds when they're not around, simply by orgasm denial. But that's not the best thing. Submissive people are there to please their dominant, not themselves, and by orgasm denial is a perfect good way to implement that in the submissive's mind. It's not about their orgasm, their plesure, but about the dominant's pleasure.
And here comes the very best part. Because someone is in orgasm denial, they'll be hornier then ever before. But also more willing to do things, in hopes it might earn them their orgasm. They'll be more willing to things, almost anything. And because they want it so bad, and it kept them horny for so long, the sex is amazing for both sides, both the submissive and dominant. The submissive finally gets some stimulation that might help them reach their orgasm. And the dominant gets to enjoy the full lust and horniness of their submissive.
Imagine: a girl so wet and horny, because she's in orgasm denial. She'll do your homework, does the dishes, the household, anything you want, in hopes of you giving her permission to cum. And when you fuck her, she'll be hornier then ever and extremely wet, because she was in orgasm denial. And when she finally cums, you feel her cunt contracting around your cock so hard, it's impossible to to shoot your load inside her. She loves it, because you gave her the best orgasm ever. And you'll love it, because you got the horniest girlfriend ever, and she does whatever you want her to do, in hopes she might earn her orgasm. Doesn't that sound like a good deal for both?

Now of course, their might be some people out there, who might have trouble to keep their hands of themselves, and orgasm without permission. And when that happens, the orgasm denial doesn't have any effect. If you want orgasm denial to work, you have to make sure the person doesn't finish it by masturbating. And for this purpose, a lot of BDSM people use a chasity belt. A great way of controling someone's orgasm, and very frustrating for the one wearing it. They can't touch themselves. And frustration is what orgasm denial is all about. The bigger the frustration and desire to cum, the better the orgasm. Some chasitybelts even have the ability, or have built-in, dildo's, buttplugs and vibrators, to make sure they get the stimalation, but can't control it. Also a vibrating egg might help if the chasitybelt doesn't have an option for a dildo or vibrator inside. There are today even vibrating eggs, that work on cellphones.
Imagine having your girlfriend wear an orgasm denial, after you teased her endlessly the night before, making her beg for an orgasm. She's wearing a chasitybelt with inside her pussy a remote controlled vibrating egg. One push of a button on your cellphone, and you'll buzz her into pleasure, keeping her horny and wetter then ever. But she can't finish herself off, because she can't touch herself through the chasitybelt. Buzz her while she's at work in the office, or during a dinner in a restaurant. See her struggle, as she's so horny, but wants to hide it from the people around her. It's almost like you're saying: come on, don't be shy, why don't you show everyone what a horny little slut you are? Why hide who you truly are?

And some dominant people do use it this way, to 'crack' their submissives into exploiting them publicly.
I've heard from women who where in chasitybelts, with toys inside them on a daily base, and they where denied their orgasm for an entire week, that at the end of the week they didn't even need anymore stimulation. They where so horny, and so wet, their nipples just stayed hard all day long, without any touching, or any stimulation at all. They where just horny as fuck. They described a tingling sensation throughout the day in their nipples and pussy, as a result of being so horny for so long without any orgasm.
I'd like to reach that point. That point where my nipples are hard all day long. My clit is tingling by default. It must make each single touch a breathtaking experience. Making every touch on your body extremely sensitive. Making your body more senstive and arousing. That even with the slightest touches, you could get an orgasm. Imagine the feeling of when you masturbate, or having sex, but then all day long, every minute, every second. Wouldn't you love that? I sure as hell would.

So please guys and girls, deny it to me one more day. But remember, orgasm denial only works if you're capable of turning the other person on. Otherwise it's just stupid. They have to want it, crave it. So it's important that you know exactly what and how to turn the other person on.
The other day I was talking to a beginning dominant. He just started ordering things around, like most beginners do. The trick to each good dominant, is to really get to know the other person. Get to know what turns them on. How to tease them. You need to able to sense when they're close to orgasm. To feel when you need to quit something. And to know when to continue something.
You want to reach that point, of just before they orgasm, that edge, and then make them stop. If you can do that, then the orgasm denial works. Otherwise it's just frustrating, and not a turn on, and you'll scare them, and make them hate orgasm denial. And truth is, you can't hate orgasm denial. You can only hate people sucking at it.

With love and kisses,

Alicia Casiragi


  1. You covered this pretty good. I know that denail till the Master/Mistress says now increases the orgasm a great deal. So much in some people that this becomes a need.

  2. That's so fucking hot...
    I so want to tie you up and make you my slave...

    When I slap my riding crop across a fresh ass.. I'll think of you...

  3. So, Alicia, how are you feeling at the moment? Nice and horny I hope ;) I'd love to read more about your suffering in orgasm denial.


  4. Yes yes yes! I'm a long time fan of OD and have had some experience In denying a sub online.
    I have also been denied myself for 2 weeks. ( I'm male) which was wild I had so much sexual energy and I ached to cum.
    I really like to see a girl taken right to the edge then denied ( my sub and I used to call it tease fucked) and her reaction/ feeling just after..Some cum to like the feeling .. Then the return of the ever increasing
    horniness. Would like to post dome stories and experiences here if u like ....

  5. Nice post! Understand tho that many ladies will go weeks or months in denial. I've had girls go over a year before. It's a wonderful life style. You should really give it a try.

  6. So how is your experiment in denial cumming-or not cumming along ....

  7. Great piece of info Alicia! I didn't know what's an orgasm denial until i stumbled upon here! Thank you so much for the info! Would like to try it as well! =D